I have been in a slump. There, I have said it. I have been depressed, lonely, stressed, worried, ashamed, and it has kept me holed up in my home sinking deeper into the slump with every passing day.
My body took a beating with the twin pregnancy. I put on a ton of weight, got rolls where I didn’t know they could form, had strange pains in my feet and legs, and discovered that I have high cholesterol. All this, plus the pressures of working and looking after the twins has had its toll on me both mentally and physically.
So instead of picking myself up and making a plan, I sat at home watching series and feeling very sorry for myself.
Luckily I have some great friends (Julz, I am looking at you) who have helped me get my head back on and a husband that has encouraged me to start making an effort. Don’t stop here – this isn’t actually a gripe post, but the introduction is going to put my latest breakthrough into context.
As my New Year’s resolution, I decided to try make more of an effort with myself for work. I went out and bought a bunch of dresses and shoes (fun fun) and dressed up a little. My office colleagues have been exceptionally encouraging, saying nice things every day to keep me motivated to dress well.
The idea behind my resolution is: The better I look, the better I will want to look. It is with that in mind that I joined my first ballet class in 20 years at a school called First Pointe. I have been threatening for an age to get to a dance class, and I finally did it.
I intended to only go and watch the first class, but there were several other women there that had come to try it out, so I decided to join in.
It is a beginner class following the grade 1 syllabus of the Royal Academy of Dance. While it’s just a start, I had an amazing time. The women in the class are all lovely and the instructor we had last night, Talia, made it fun and interesting to be doing the basic steps.
It took me right back to being a little girl with dreams of becoming a prima ballerina. And feeling young again has done wonders for me, and I suspect it will continue to do wonders for my self-esteem.
I was so pleased with the class – I signed up then and there for the next month.
So every Monday night from now on, I will be pointing toes, prancing and pirouetting my way to feeling better about myself.
To add to the mix, First Pointe also does a beginner Pilates class, which I intend to join. I have heard that Pilates is a fantastic way to try and recover your body from the trauma of pregnancy, so I am really excited to start doing that.
You see, you can’t get yourself feeling good about yourself by watching soppy series and girly movies. You have to get off your bum and make it happen.
I had convinced myself that there was no time for me to do these things. But I have since come to my senses and realised that there is always a way to fit in time for yourself, even with the twins.
I may not ever become Anna Pavlova, but a new revitalised me is now more of a reality than it was yesterday. A huge thanks to First Pointe for giving me back some hope – and that just after a single class.